Weapons of mass destruction: a mascara wand and a tube card
Women - think carefully about your actions. They have consequences. And these consequences have the potential to resonate across the human race.
All it takes is a bit of care. Use your weapons carefully. They have the potential to protect you or backfire against you.
Enough of the rhetoric - I'm shooting from the hip. I'm talking about the senseless act of women applying their make-up on public transport. What a way to shatter the illusion!
A woman's beauty is based on illusion. The look of long eyelashes - thank you mascara. The appeal of golden brown skin- bring on St Tropez. And for plump, youthful lips - seek the ever helpful Anti-Freeze cream. These are just some of the secrets we keep under lock and key.
Did you ever see Cleopatra jump in the public pools for her milk bath, or a geisha girl stop to re-touch her face in the middle of the street?
No. Because most women, no matter what nationality, know that the art of beauty is making it look effortless. Men are meant to believe that we simply wake up looking like this. And for the most part, there's a secret joy women experience in convincing men of this.
So why must some women carelessly destroy what other women have taken such care and skill to conceal from men? It's an art-form in itself, let alone the art of painting one's face.
With one wave of a mascara wand on any form of public transport, and a woman has single-handedly brought down everything that is sacred.
And can I just say that I've never seen an uglier sight than a woman squinting into a hand mirror, hand shaking, mouth open to ridiculously apply a dubious line underneath her eye. I mean, have you ever heard of a woman being picked up when applying her make-up on the tube!?!
Forget about saving time and think about your fellow woman first. Consider what weapon of choice you want to use and when. Think peace, not public transport.
All it takes is a bit of care. Use your weapons carefully. They have the potential to protect you or backfire against you.
Enough of the rhetoric - I'm shooting from the hip. I'm talking about the senseless act of women applying their make-up on public transport. What a way to shatter the illusion!
A woman's beauty is based on illusion. The look of long eyelashes - thank you mascara. The appeal of golden brown skin- bring on St Tropez. And for plump, youthful lips - seek the ever helpful Anti-Freeze cream. These are just some of the secrets we keep under lock and key.
Did you ever see Cleopatra jump in the public pools for her milk bath, or a geisha girl stop to re-touch her face in the middle of the street?
No. Because most women, no matter what nationality, know that the art of beauty is making it look effortless. Men are meant to believe that we simply wake up looking like this. And for the most part, there's a secret joy women experience in convincing men of this.
So why must some women carelessly destroy what other women have taken such care and skill to conceal from men? It's an art-form in itself, let alone the art of painting one's face.
With one wave of a mascara wand on any form of public transport, and a woman has single-handedly brought down everything that is sacred.
And can I just say that I've never seen an uglier sight than a woman squinting into a hand mirror, hand shaking, mouth open to ridiculously apply a dubious line underneath her eye. I mean, have you ever heard of a woman being picked up when applying her make-up on the tube!?!
Forget about saving time and think about your fellow woman first. Consider what weapon of choice you want to use and when. Think peace, not public transport.
posted by Zap at
6:47 pm
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